Reading

Mantle Model

Mantle plumes explain Hawaii, Yellowstone, Iceland, the East African Rift, the Adirondack uplift, the Permian extinction, the decline of Rome, the DB Cooper hijacking, and the balrog in Moria. Those little hills of sand in your yard are caused by antle plumes.

Episode 2673: Bomb Fact

https://www.darthsanddroids.net/episodes/2673.html

Episode 2673: Bomb Fact

Aliases are fine, but often stories use really bad ones. The classic is the Sdrawkcab Alias (especially looking at you, Alucard), but there are other lazy aliases, and themed aliases such as always using the same initials. The whole point of an alias is to make it hard to figure out who you are, yet so many characters in fiction choose obvious ones.

Of course this means in a game you can go either way, depending on your sense of drama or realism.

aurilee writes:

Commentary by memnarch (who has not seen the movie)

Okay..... everyone's still not panicking or otherwise acting excited..... Not a betrayal by Babu then? I still can't think of any reason for Evil Threepio though, so there's probably something in the movie dialogue that I'm missing that would explain things. Or at least make some sort of sense for the movie. That could just be wishful thinking though; we've already had a number of seemingly nonsensical things show up already. Neat that the character managed to come back from the Sarlacc though!

Hang on. Why would Boba Fett care about any of the PCs here? None of them have met Boba Fett before, or had anything to do with Obi-Wan. Maybe that's how the comic scene is going to play out? Perhaps one of the players realizes that same thing, questions the GM/Boba on it, some more discussion happens, and then Threepio goes back to normal. Mind you, that still wouldn't explain the currently evil eyes or the droid surgery, but that wouldn't be anywhere close to the largest unexplained thing in the last 20 comics.

Episode 2672: Open Our Eyes, That We May See

An interesting trick is to not reveal something important to all of the players at once. Rather reveal it to one player, and let them inform the others. This works especially well if the characters are actually in places where some of them might not get the (bad) news at the same time as others. Or if the discovery is something made by one of them because of skills they have that the others don't.

For example, is a scout is exploring ahead of the main party, you can let the scout's player know what they discover, and let them decide whether or not to return to the party and pass on the information. Or if they are searching a room, one of the party will find the significant treasure (or cursed item) before the others, so let that player know what they find and let them tell the others. Or if one person has particular perception, such as a keen-eyed elf able to spot enemies at far greater the distance than anyone else, give them the info and see how they relate it to their comrades.

This saves you some descriptive work as the GM and gives the player with the info a chance to roleplay and put their own spin on things.

aurilee writes:

Commentary by memnarch (who has not seen the movie)

Oh, well, that's not a good sign. I can't think of anything where "suddenly red eyes" means something good is going to happen. All the other characters besides Poe seem unconcerned so far, so Babu betraying them does seem most likely here. That would also fit the theme of the writers not having any idea where the plot goes as the whole point of this detour would be to make an evil C-3P0. Who is, out of all of the characters, probably the most harmless to make evil in the end, so this won't even be that effective a betrayal by Babu. And even if Threepio knows a language that sounds horrible, the droid's body is still awkward and slow, and also not that loud. Disappointment all around!

At least the player instrument band seems to be going well. I don't know if a self-respecting drummer being the only one with face paint would go well, but if everyone else does it too? There might be some interest in that, even if they're not animal faces.

Transcript

https://www.darthsanddroids.net/episodes/2672.html

Chess Variant

https://xkcd.com/3139/

The draw-by-repetition rule does a good job of keeping players from sliding a tile back and forth repeatedly, but the tiles definitely introduce some weird en passant and castling edge cases.

https://xkcd.com/3139/

We’re Doing it Again!

Posted by John Kovalic

https://www.dorktower.com/2025/09/08/were-doing-it-again/

https://dorktower.kovalic.com/?p=19670

HERE WE GO AGAIN! Insane Charity Bike Ride 2025is here!

There is much coolness to be grabbed…all for helping a GREAT cause!

https://www.dorktower.com/2025/09/08/were-doing-it-again/

https://dorktower.kovalic.com/?p=19670

INSANE CHARITY BIKE RIDE 2025 – LUCKY 13!

Posted by John Kovalic

https://www.dorktower.com/2025/09/08/btb/

https://dorktower.kovalic.com/?p=19662

For the thirteenth year, I’m taking to a bicycle, to help raise money to help local farmers get fresh-food to local low-income and elderly households.

This year will be different, however. IF we can hit the $20,000 goal:

(a) I will cycle with the Duck of Doom on my helmet, but more importantly

(b) That will bring the grand total of all Insane Charity Bike Rides (2011-2025) to A QUARTER OF A MILLION DOLLARS!

A few things to note:

The original Munchkin card art at the $375 and above levels will be from a MAJOR upcoming Munchkin release. How major? I can’t say what it its, but it will be announced at Gamehole Con in October, and it should blow your socks off! You won’t want to miss it!
I’ve added Sponsorship levels, so companies can pick up advertising at DorkTower.com that is 100% a charitable deduction, tax-wise. These may be added to any level.
The 2024 swag went out later than I had hoped. This was entirely on me. I shall endeavor this year to have all swag sent off by US Thanksgiving, 2025.
Due to a terribly busy summer, this is the latest I’ve ever launched an Insane Charity Bike Ride campaign, so I’m kind of worried about hitting the $20,000 goal. But I have hope…

SUPPORT LEVELS AND REWARDS

ANY donation – The 2025 Coloring Book PDF . Look, even simply getting the word out helps, but nothing beats cash. I realize money is tight these days all round, but any amount helps, no matter how small. Donate, and you will get a PDF of the brand-new coloring book (hopefully celebrating the $250,000 landmark).

$35 – The 2025 Munchkin Charity Postcard and the 2025 Coloring Book PDF.

$75 – The 2025 Army of Dorkness Sergeant Button, the 2025 Postcard the 2025 Coloring Book PDF

$125 – Kovalic’s Munchkin Miscellany – I’ve a few copies of this comic book left from the Munchkin BIG BOX Kickstarter, and Steve Jackson Games has graciously allowed me to use these for charity purposes.

There’s lots of nifty stories and favorite bits of art in this, and it’s a ton of fun! Also, you get the Button, 2025 Postcard, Munchkin Miscellany and the 2025 Coloring Book PDF (14 of 15 remaining)

$200 – All 12 prior Insane Charity Bike Ride Postcards, Munchkin Miscellany, the 2025 Button, 2025 Postcard, and the 2025 Coloring Book PDF (8 of 10 remaining)

$300 – The 2025 Gamehole Con plushie, Karlos the Kobold, Munchkin Miscellany, Button, 2025 Postcard, the 2025 Coloring Book PDF (20 of 20 remaining)

$375 – Original Munchkin Art!!! As always, I don’t sell original Munchkin art. This is the only way you can obtain a piece, and the upcoming release this year’s art will be selected from will be HUGE. Plus, Munchkin Miscellany, the 2025 Button, all 12 prior Postcards, 2025 Postcard, the 2025 Coloring Book PDF (16 of 20 remaining)

$600 – Be among the first to read THE DORK WEB, the new Dork Tower collection, along with a DORK WEB T-shirt and a Gilly the Perky Goth plushie along with a limited signed and sketched-in edition of the book itself, when it’s released in early 2026! Plus All Prior Postcards, Original Munchkin Art, Kobold plushie, Munchkin Miscellany, Button, Postcard the 2025 Coloring Book PDF (10 of 10 remaining)

$1000 – Appear in a Dork Tower Comic! You, your frtiend, your family, or even a pet will appear in a Dork Tower strip! We can talk about how best to fit you or your loved one into a strip. You also get Original Art, a pre-publication copy of The Dork Web PDF, T-shirt, Signed and Sketched limited edition copy of the Dork Web when published, Gilly the Perky Goth Plushie, All Prior Postcards, Original Munchkin Art, Kobold, Munchkin Miscellany, Button, Postcard the 2025 Coloring Book PDF (2 of 2 remaining)

$2,000 – Become an Official Munchkin Card! You, a friend, your family, or even a pet will become an official Munchkin card! You also get 100 printed cards and the card’s original art, along with a pre-publication copy of The Dork Web PDF, T-shirt, Signed and Sketched limited edition copy of the Dork Web when published, Gilly the Perky Goth Plushie, All Prior Postcards, Original Munchkin Art, Kobold, Munchkin Miscellany, Button, Postcard the 2025 Coloring Book PDF (2 of 2 remaining)

SPONSORSHIP LEVEL 1 – Add $1,250 to any level for six months of ads on DorkTower.com. The ads may be changed up to four times and may include Dork Tower characters. (4 of 4 remaining)

SPONSORSHIP LEVEL 2 – Add $2,000 to any level for a full year of ads on DorkTower.com. The ads may be changed up to eight times and may include Dork Tower characters. (2 of 2 remaining)

PLEASE NOTE, there may be an added cost for shipping the physical rewards outside of the United States, depending on the whims of the current US administration. We apologize deeply for this, and will contact supporters as the time approaches.

STRETCH GOALS

Hitting $5,000 – A sticker commemorating the 13th Insane Charity Bike Ride campaign will be included with all physical orders.

Hitting $10,000 – I’ll ride with the Steve Jackson Games Tentacles of Doom again!

Hitting $15,000 – A unique Munchkin card commemorating the 13th Insane Charity Bike Ride campaign will be included with all physical orders.

Hitting $20,000 – THE DUCK! THE DUCK! THE DUCK! I’ll ride with the Steve Jackson Games Duck of Doom on my helmet again!

Hitting $25,000 – (To be announced. Mmmmmmmmaybe the second duck? Hmmmmmmmm?)

I’m TOTALLY nervous about making the goal this year, but let’s help local farmers help local families, and do some more good for the world!

John

https://www.dorktower.com/2025/09/08/btb/

https://dorktower.kovalic.com/?p=19662

Episode 2671: You Got My Future in Your Hands

https://www.darthsanddroids.net/episodes/2671.html

Episode 2671: You Got My Future in Your Hands

There's endless value in recycling typical experiences from everyday life, exporting them to a campaign world context.

Before casting a spell from a magical scroll, you have to scan through and agree to multiple pages of terms and conditions.
Your neural skill-chip implant reboots mid-way through a karate fight to install a required security patch.
Attempting to scry on someone using a crystal ball, only to get a "no signal" message.
You're trying to sneak past guards in the dark when your infrared stealth helmet interrupts live feed for a couple of unskippable ads.
A wizard's dungeon puzzle where you have to identify which squares contain horse-drawn wagons.

aurilee writes:

Commentary by memnarch (who has not seen the movie)

A quest item? Proof of being a related Resistance group? Actually a personal momento? A surveillance chip? Okay, probably not that last one; I don't think Star Wars has had anything that compact and flat for spying with. And maybe not the memento either since there's no chain for it to be a necklace or a place to put a hand or finger through.

Interesting that the visor vanished. A sign that Zorii is trying to impress on Poe that the disc is important? Or maybe just the writers trying to humanize the otherwise faceless person. Honestly though, my first thought was really "did that zoop up into the top or the bottom of the helmet?" Because that'd be just the unnecessary neat detail a Daft Punk helmet in Star Wars would have.

Corey obviously doesn't know about dramatic cuts. Maybe that only counts if Poe finds out more about that dagger in the next page though? Or it could be a sign that Zorii already knows about the factory being a setup, and the GM wants to see what kind of mess Jim makes by (not) sharing that info to the rest of the players.

Transcript

https://www.darthsanddroids.net/episodes/2671.html

Dimensional Lumber Tape Measure

https://xkcd.com/3138/

A person with two watches is never sure what time it is, especially if I got them one of the watches.

https://xkcd.com/3138/

Hungry, Hungry Hopefuls – DORK TOWER 05.09.25

Posted by John Kovalic

https://www.dorktower.com/2025/09/05/19658/

https://dorktower.kovalic.com/?p=19658

This or any DORK TOWER strip is now available as a signed, high-quality print, from just $25! CLICK HERE to find out more!

HEY! Want to help keep DORK TOWER going? Then consider joining the DORK TOWER Patreon and ENLIST IN THE ARMY OF DORKNESS TODAY! (We have COOKIES!) (And SWAG!) (And GRATITUDE!)

https://www.dorktower.com/2025/09/05/19658/

https://dorktower.kovalic.com/?p=19658

Episode 2670: Pressure Points

https://www.darthsanddroids.net/episodes/2670.html

Episode 2670: Pressure Points

Sometimes as a GM you need to take a short break, to grab a drink or use the toilet or whatever. It's a nice sign when you come back and all your players are still talking in character.

aurilee writes:

Commentary by memnarch (who has not seen the movie)

Some of my favorite game sessions were with little to no GM input. A Mutants & Masterminds game, we called them "paperwork sessions", and they were nothing but roleplaying the characters between ourselves using a setting of needing to handle superhero paperwork as the set piece for everyone to be in the same space. We usually talked about events that had previously happened but hadn't had time to roleplay the personal consequences we'd wanted, but sometimes we did some planning as well. Sometimes a favorite NPC would get requested for a short aside, but usually they'd just show up at the end after the session was called good for a joke about all the remaining papers that needed filing or that were left on the table as the players left.

Anyway, whatever's happening to C-3P0 is surprisingly sparky. I guess they've survived dismemberment before though, so this couldn't be that bad in the movie. Probably.

Transcript

https://www.darthsanddroids.net/episodes/2670.html

Cursed Number

https://xkcd.com/3137/

Another group of mathematicians is working to put an upper bound on the number, although everyone keeps begging them to stop.

https://xkcd.com/3137/

Episode 2669: So How’s About Joinin’ My Lovin’ Session?

https://www.darthsanddroids.net/episodes/2669.html

Episode 2669: So How’s About Joinin’ My Lovin’ Session?

Tragic backstories are overrated. Sure, they're common in fiction, but not every character in a game needs one. It just gets to be a bit much.

Instead try to have characters with surprisingly normal backstories. Or even no backstory at all. Honestly, does anyone need to know what the innkeeper did with their whole life before becoming an innkeeper? Skip it and just get to the dungeon-raiding already!

aurilee writes:

Commentary by memnarch (who has not seen the movie)

Wait, an assassin's dart meant for someone else? Hah! Hahahahahaa! Okay, that's not funny in the sense of a tragic backstory, but wow, that's such a callback! I guess the GM didn't completely get rid of those backstory notes after all.

And of course Jim is mostly ignoring what's said. I am not surprised in the slightest. I wonder if movie Poe is actually getting some intel on the planet here. Explosions usually wouldn't be randomly going off, even in a manufacturing environment, plus we already saw the patrols going on. Possibly even door-kicking and searching for someone or something? I would guess they're trying to stamp out Resistance members or Resistance sympathizers, but this is just some random planet that the main characters happened to go to, as far as I know. Why would the First Order be bothering with that kind of action here?

Transcript

https://www.darthsanddroids.net/episodes/2669.html

Pull

https://xkcd.com/3136/

Be careful fighting gravity. If you win, it's a long way down.

https://xkcd.com/3136/

Episode 2668: Factory of Dreams

https://www.darthsanddroids.net/episodes/2668.html

Episode 2668: Factory of Dreams

Traps need some sort of bait. If the heroes can ignore the obvious or suspected danger, why wouldn't they? You need to give them something juicy to make rushing into the jaws of death worthwhile. Even if it's nothing more than a mystery or facade.

That provides another level of trickery. They might expect some reward, but often the lure can be fake. As long as the heroes believe there's bait there, they may take it anyway.

aurilee writes:

Commentary by memnarch (who has not seen the movie)

A typo on a dagger? Yeah, that's nonsense. Who would bother printing text straight onto a dagger? I think Hux could have the right idea that it's a mishearing though: Factoid Bait, Fanciful Spate, Fragmented Slate... plenty of things that could fit an inattentive carver. Really, the weird part is bothering to carve a dagger with an invitation or whatever it is in the first place.

Hmm. So if Kylo is commanding a factory with a gate to be built as bait, then it's definitely going to be a trap. How much is this First Order construction going to stick out like a sore thumb? Given the atmosphere of the place so far, I bet quite a bit. And then Poe is going to be the one that drags the rest of the party into the place in spite of that obviousness. Aaaaand somehow things will work out okay. Or okay enough for the sequel episodes lately; there's only so much work that "okay" can handle.

Or maybe Factory Gate will end up being the name of a bar somewhere. Wouldn't that be a surprise twist for everyone in the game?

Transcript

https://www.darthsanddroids.net/episodes/2668.html

Sea Level

https://xkcd.com/3135/

They're up there with coral islands, lightning, and caterpillars turning into butterflies.

https://xkcd.com/3135/